


Just This Once

by StarCrossedRebel



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-20
Updated: 2019-12-20
Packaged: 2021-02-25 05:54:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21871135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarCrossedRebel/pseuds/StarCrossedRebel
Summary: I know that this idea is kinda outdated, but I just really wanted to do a quick one chapter story of Ren and Hux's first and last time together intimately after the destruction of Starkiller.
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Kylo Ren
Comments: 1
Kudos: 43





	Just This Once

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Holidays everyone!!!

Hux sat hunched in the hard plastic chair, his elbows resting on his knees, his fingers tented and pressed against his mouth. His right leg bounced incessantly. He was aware of the motion, and he hated fidgeting, but right now it was the only thing keeping him sane. He’d never, in all of his years of hard life, felt this stressed and helpless before. The ground had literally collapsed beneath his feet, and with it, everything he cared about. He was exhausted and devastated and angry and he was dirty beyond measure. He smelled acrid, like smoke and blood. He could feel the grime coating his skin. He wanted a hot shower and to scrube his skin raw. And after that? A deep sleep where he wouldn’t have to exist for a few hours. But sleep refused to come. Hux was running on stims and caf and pure will at this point.  
It wasn’t the loss of Starkiller that kept him up. He could—no, would—rebuild. He was furious about being so drastically set back, of course, but he knew this wasn’t the end. They had the schematics, the materials, and the labor force, after all; it was just a matter of time until Starkiller 2.0 came to fruition.  
So what had him so wound up, unable to sleep? What made his leg bounce and his chest ache?  
The answer was lying unconscious before him.  
Ren looked dead beneath the medical bay’s harsh fluorescent lighting. After being released from the bacta tank, the med team had deposited him on a raised bed with starch white linens. They had left him uncovered, save for a pair of black boxers, so as not to irritate his wounds, which were extensive and wrapped with thick gauze. His torso looked as if it had been mummified. The only wound the doctors hadn’t dressed was the one cutting across Ren’s face. The sight of it made Hux sick. It started in the middle of his forehead and split across his nose and cheek. It was a ghastly shade of red against Ren’s pale skin. Undoubtedly, it would scar.  
The doctors had ensured Hux that Ren would make a full recovery. There was a private sense of relief in hearing this. He knew it was selfish and foolish to feel this way. Snoke had demanded that he bring Ren to him. Who knew what Snoke would do to Ren. Hux may have saved Ren from one death, only to deliver him to another, much worse one. Perhaps it would have been better if Ren had died from blood loss and exposure rather than be subjugated to Snoke’s twisted schemes. But Hux wasn’t in a position to indulge in his emotions. He was a military man; he followed his head, not his heart. Even if it killed the last part of him that was human, he would deliver Ren to Snoke’s citadel.  
Hux was so lost in these hopeless thoughts that he failed to notice when Ren regained consciousness. He nearly jumped at the sudden voice in the room.  
“I thought you were dead,” Ren said in a rasp. He was staring levelly at Hux, the exhaustion and pain clear on his face.  
Hux straightened in the chair and cleared his throat. “Sorry to disappoint,” he said, “though to be fair, I also thought you were dead.”  
Ren pushed himself into a sitting position, so his back was against the bedframe and his legs were stretched out before him. Although his expression remained passive, he moved with agonizing slowness. “It’s nothing more than a scratch,” he said.  
Hux startled them both by the laugh that burst out of his mouth “You nearly got cut in half,” he said. “I think your injuries are a bit more serious than ‘a scratch’. You had to spend nearly forty-eight hours in a bacta tank for star’s sake, and then you remained unconscious for another fifteen.”  
This news seemed to trouble Ren. His eyebrows bunched together and he frowned. “I didn’t realize I had been out for so long.”  
Hux scoffed. “Honestly, from you, I’d expect nothing less. You caused this whole mess and then just slept through the pitfall and clean up.”  
Ren clenched his jaw. “I did not—”  
Hux cut Ren off before he could start on one of his defensive rants. “I don’t want to talk about it anymore today,” he said with a wave of his hand. “What’s done is done.” With some difficulty, for his joints and muscles were stiff from sitting for so long, Hux stood up. He took a moment to roll his shoulders and neck.  
“So what happens now?” Ren asked.  
Hux gave his dreaded answer in a matter of fact tone. “Snoke has ordered me to bring you to him to complete your training. We are to set off as soon as the doctors clear you.”  
Ren let his gaze drift to the wall behind Hux. He gave a short nod of understanding, signifying the end of their conversation.  
Hux flexed his hand at his side, for once in his life at a loss. “I should probably get the doctor,” he said.  
Again, Ren nodded. “Snoke doesn’t like to be kept waiting,” he said. “The sooner we set off, the better.”  
“My thoughts exactly,” Hux said. He forced himself to turn around and walk to the door. He got as far as gripping the handle before he stopped. He could see the blurry shadows of people beyond the opaque window. He knew that once he opened that door, there was no going back. Fate would rush in and spirit Ren away to a far away place. Possibly to a place that Hux wouldn’t be able to reach no matter how far and fast he traveled. You couldn’t catch up to death. This was Hux’s last and only chance.  
“Well, fuck,” Hux whispered to himself.  
“Excuse me?” Ren said from behind him.  
Hux pushed the heels of his hands into his eyes and turned around. “I said ‘fuck’!” he said. “This all turned out to be such a mess.”  
Ren didn’t say anything—couldn’t say anything, really. Hux sighed and let his hands drop. He stared at Ren. “You could have just followed orders for once in your life,” he accused. “You had to run off on some doomed, madman mission. Now look where we are.”  
Ren picked at the gauze on his stomach. “And here I thought you would have been happy to finally be rid of me,” he said.  
It was true that two years ago Hux would have gladly done away with Ren. He would have loved nothing more than to shoot him out of an airlock. Ren was nothing short of infuriating; he was arrogant, tactless, and idiotic at times. He disregarded Hux’s orders, purposefully scared his men, and destroyed expensive equipment. He was a walking disaster, a headache waiting to happen. And yet no one had ever challenged Hux quite like Ren before. Ironically, Hux had met his match. He feared how mundane his life would become without Ren in it.  
“It will certainly be more quiet without you stomping around and terrorizing my crew,” Hux said.  
Ren refused to look at Hux. “So what’s the hold up then?” he asked. “Go get the doctor so that he can clear me for travel.”  
What was the hold up here? What was Hux planning on doing? He couldn’t save Ren. His fate rested entirely in the hands of Snoke. Hux couldn’t risk his career, everything he had built and achieved, for—what?—attachment? This is where their choices had led them. Hux was out of time, out of options. So what? What was he going to do? There was no fixing or changing anything.  
Feeling oddly detached from reality, Hux walked back to Ren’s bedside. “I hated you from the moment I met you,” he told Ren.  
A wry smile twisted Ren’s lips. “What sweet parting words,” he said.  
“You’re the most infuriating man I’ve ever met,” Hux continued. “You’re terrible at following orders and you always rush into everything without thinking first.”  
“Is there a point to any of this, Hux?” Ren asked. “Or are you just trying to belittle me one last time.”  
Hux came so close to the bed that his knees bumped into the mattress. “I wish I could have been the one to kill you,” he said.  
Ren considered Hux with his wide brown eyes. Hux couldn't discern what emotion was there. For a few timeless seconds, they were trapped in each other’s gaze. Then Ren rested his hands on either side of his body, palms up, and rested his head against the wall. “So do it,” he said.  
Hux swallowed his doubts and brought his hands up so that he could fit them around Ren’s neck. Ren didn’t resist; he only closed his eyes and tilted his neck. His skin was warm and smooth against Hux’s palms. Warning bells started going off in Hux’s head, but he silenced them. He couldn’t change their past or their future, but maybe he could have this. If only for a moment, and at the very eye of the storm, they had found peace.  
“Don’t lie,” Hux whispered. “You might be dead soon enough. In an hour, we can go back to hating each other. But right now, I want honesty.”  
Hux saw Ren’s eyebrows bunch up in confusion, but he didn’t explain or give Ren a chance to read his mind. He just let himself fall into the current of desire. With equal parts pain and pleasure, Hux bent over Ren and kissed him deeply on the mouth.  
Ren immediately tensed up. His hands, which were resting on the bed passively moments before, shot up to find purchase. He struggled against Hux, trying to free his mouth. Hux pushed back. He didn’t let Ren go until they were both out of breath and red in the face.  
Ren sputtered. “What the hell was that!”  
Hux released his hold around Ren’s neck, but he remained stooped over the other man. “Honesty,” he said.  
Ren’s eyes were big and wild. Hux could see the desperation in them clearly. “Why would you do that?” he demanded  
Hux considered Ren’s question and said, “I figured it was now or never.”  
Ren shook his head. He was starting to look angry. “Our fates are not intertwined,” he said. “The Force has different paths for us. I’m going to Snoke’s citadel, in all likelihood to be killed for my failures, and you’re going to be here, in the Order.”  
Hux didn’t want to hear or talk about fate or Force paths. He believed in destiny, but he also believed in the will of man. Perhaps the destination was predetermined, but the journey there was not.  
Putting these ideas into words, Hux said, “But right now you’re here and I’m here and the galaxy hasn’t caught up with us just yet. We can’t change the future, but we can decide what happens in this moment.”  
Ren looked at Hux and then at the wall. “That was uncharastically poetic of you,” he said.  
“An hour of honesty,” Hux said. “Then we can go back to hating each other and face what’s to come next.”  
Ren took a deep, silent breath. Hux saw the fight drain out of him. With more bravery than he probably ever needed on the battlefield, Ren cupped the back of Hux’s neck with his hand and applied a gentle pressure. They both kept their eyes open until the last second. When their lips connected this time, Hux sighed. What a bittersweet moment it was. It was his own fault he was going to get hurt. He shouldn’t have let his emotions get away from him. But he would have this one thing, even if it felt like he was dying.  
Hux didn’t want to rush anything, but time was of the essence. As much as he wanted to take things slow, he knew they’d have to be efficient about things. Hux broke away from the kiss to carefully climb on top of Ren. Ren helped him keep his balance, until Hux was finally straddling his waist. Then he leaned back down and renewed their kiss.  
The new position allowed Hux to freely explore more of Ren’s body. He was conscious of his wounds, which were still raw and tender, so he avoided touching Ren’s torso. He methodically tested Ren’s reactions to certain stimuli: biting his lip, nibbling on his ear, sucking on his neck. Ren, for his part, remained pliant and responsive to Hux’s ministrations. Other than the sound of his labored breathing, Ren was quiet, but Hux noticed when he tensed his muscles. Ren seemed to enjoy having the stretch of skin below his ear kissed, so Hux focused a good deal of attention on this area, interjecting little nips and licks. Ren titled his neck to the side to give Hux more room. Hux saw that Ren’s eyes were closed and felt that his hands were squeezing hard at Hux’s sides. It was obvious that he wanted more but wasn’t experienced enough to know how to take the next step.  
With a quick parting kiss, Hux sat up straight on Ren’s lap. He didn’t waste time playing coy. With deft fingers, he unbuttoned the front of his tunic and pulled it off his shoulders, revealing his narrow, white frame. Ordinarily, he might have felt uncomfortable having his body exposed in such a stark way. There was nothing very appealing about his small chest and his ribs poking out. But these weren’t ordinary circumstances.  
Ren’s eyes trailed slowly from Hux’s navel up to his collarbone. It wasn’t a heated look, but it was certainly raw with desire. Although he was hesitant at first, Ren reached a hand out and splayed it across Hux’s flat stomach. Hux couldn’t help it—he shuddered at the contact, at the warmth of Ren’s hand. He’d been starved most of his life of human touch. To have Ren’s skin against his own was almost overwhelming.  
Ren explored Hux’s upper body in a near clinical fashion, almost as if he were curious. He traced the outline of Hux’s ribs, rubbed his thumb over Hux’s nipple, and ran his hands down Hux’s arms, feeling the slight divots and curves. He was especially fascinated by the inside of Hux’s left wrist, which was marred by a crescent shaped scar. Looking somewhat unsure of himself, Ren brought Hux’s wrist to his lips and kissed it.  
If Hux’s heart broke at the gentleness of Ren’s kiss, he didn’t show it. Instead, with the sort of maneuvering that would have made a contortionist impressed, Hux shimmied out of his pants, leaving he and Ren in nothing more than their boxers. When he nestled his body back into Ren’s, he could feel Ren’s cock against his own. This was where things got fun.  
Framing his face with his hands, Hux pulled Ren into another kiss, this time adding a bit of tongue into the mix. At the same time, Hux reached down and palmed Ren’s cock. He began rubbing it through the thin material of his boxers, squeezing every now and then for good measure. Ren moaned low in his throat. The sound sent a thrill down Hux’s spine. He broke away from Ren’s mouth to kiss down his neck, sucking a mark into the junction of his shoulder. Ren bucked his hips involuntarily and grunted.  
Arousal was beginning to snake its way through Hux’s body. His breathing was fast and his hands were shaking. A new sense of conviction fueled his actions. He would burn these moments into his memory forever. If he was to be haunted, he would be haunted by the sounds of Ren’s moans, by the face he made as he came undone beneath Hux. He was going to give everything he had, and take everything he could.  
Hux tugged at Ren’s waist, urging him to lift his butt. When Ren did, Hux pulled his boxers down. His cock sprang free. It stood thick and proud, at least six inches long; precome beaded from the fat tip. Hux took the appendage lightly in his hand and stroked. The skin was hot and silky. Ren’s breath stuttered in his chest.  
It occurred to Hux that he would need to find a lubricant of some sort. There was a cupboard in the corner of the room. Although it was used to store medical supplies, Hux was sure he could find something of use in there. Forcing himself to break away, Hux slipped off Ren and padded across the room. Scanning the shelves quickly, Hux spotted a vial of aloe vera salve. He snatched it from its spot and went straight back to Ren, who was looking rather wrecked. Hux stepped out of his boxers and climbed back over him. He saw Ren’s adam’s apple bob. Hux wondered if he was nervous.  
As if reading his mind—though he probably really was—Ren said, “I’ve never—”  
“I’ll handle it,” Hux assured him. He popped the lid to the vial and drizzled aloe vera over his fingers. It’d been a while since he last prepared himself like this. He gritted his teeth against the intrusion of his first finger. He didn’t want to waste time with this part, so he quickly added a second, trying to stretch his hole as fast as possible. Ren watched him in utter stillness, his mouth slightly agape. On a particularly hard and accidentally well aimed jab of his fingers, Hux hit his prostate. The sensation was so unexpected that Hux couldn’t stop the moan that fell wantonly from his mouth. Ren reached behind Hux and grabbed onto his wrist, stopping his movements.  
“What?” Hux panted.  
Ren swallowed thickly. “Let me,” he said.  
Although he really wanted to get on with things, Hux drew his hand back and handed Ren the vial of aloe vera. Ren coated his fingers and wordless pressed them against Hux’s hole. He was expecting a tactless finger fuck, but Ren gently massaged his way inside Hux. He could feel the stretch of his fingers, but there was no pain. He felt himself relax around Ren.  
This was his first mistake: thinking that Ren was a bumbling fool and would just stumble his way through. He had forgotten that Ren possessed Force powers. He could sense thing that Hux couldn’t, like the exact position of his prostate. Hux cried out when Ren hit his prostate dead on and rubbed it with the tips of his fingers. Pleasure surged through Hux. He choked on another moan and arched his back. His self control crumbled in an instant and he began to rock back on Ren’s hand. Ren let him and watched enraptured, keeping his fingers in place as Hux writhered on them.  
With one of his hands thoroughly occupied, Ren used his other hand to tease Hux’s cock. He kept it in a loose grip and lazily stroked it, making sure to cup his balls on the descent. Hux’s body thrummed with pleasure. Already, he could feel the hazy promise of orgasm. He rocked back harder onto Ren’s fingers, allowing small, grateful moans to spill from his lips. Ren seemed to be driven slightly mad by the noises Hux made. He tried capturing each moan with a kiss. Then, switching gears, he leaned forward so that he could suck on Hux’s nipples. Hux jolted when Ren nipped at one. It was suddenly too much—the pressure on his prostate, the hand on his cock, the lips around his nipple. If Ren didn’t stop now, Hux was going to come.  
“Ren,” Hux gasped. “I’m going to come.”  
Ren released his nipple but didn’t stop his other ministrations. “Isn’t that the idea?” he growled.  
Hux shook his head. “Not yet. Not like this.”  
Ren stilled his movements. “Then how?” he asked.  
“Lean back,” Hux instructed.  
Reluctantly, Ren pulled his fingers out of Hux and leaned back into his pillows. Hux fumbled with the aloe vera vial and spilled it in the palm of his hand. Then he took Ren’s cock into his hand and slicked it up. Hux’s entire body was vibrating with anticipation and need. As soon as Ren was adequately lubricated, Hux raised up onto his knees slightly and brought the head of Ren’s cock to his hole. Lowering his knees, Hux sank onto Ren’s cock slowly. He didn’t care about the pain. All that he cared about was the hiss of pleasure that escaped between Ren’s teeth and the way Ren screwed his eyes shut. It was all the motivation he needed to take Ren fully inside himself. When he finally bottomed out, he clenched his muscles and ground his hips at the same time. Ren’s helpless moan was his reward. It spurred him on.  
With his rather limited experience, Hux knew the best way to make a man come was to set a steady rhythm. So this is what Hux did. And instead of riding him up and down, Hux decided that he would rock against Ren, riding him forwards and backwards. He wanted to keep Ren as deep inside of him as possible.  
As Hux set his pace, Ren began to regain control of some of his basic motor functions. He gripped Hux’s wasit with his hands, bringing Hux’s lower body down forcefully as he bucked up. These thrusts were well aimed, hitting Hux’s prostate each time. Given all of this, they were both gasping and moaning incessantly in no time. Hux knew that neither of them was going to last very long. But he also didn’t care. He had never felt this intensely good in all of his life. The last thing he wanted before the end was to feel Ren’s lips against his own while they were fucking, so he leaned down and kissed Ren passionately.  
The world didn’t fall away in that moment like it did in the movies. Hux was still painfully aware of the reality of their situation. But instead of striking him down, it only made him more determined. The galaxy couldn’t take this memory away from him. He would make sure it was a good one.  
Ren’s moans were beginning to devolve into growls. He sounded downright animalistic. Hux could feel his desperation. They were beginning to lose rhythm and were starting to rut against each other like wild teenagers. There was no drawing it out. Hux let Ren take control and thrust into him with abandon. Meanwhile, Hux took his own cock into his hand and worked himself to completion. As he tipped over the edge, he choked on Ren’s name. It was like pulling a trigger. Ren groaned loudly and released inside Hux. Hux moaned at the feeling and his own come splashed across Ren’s chest, completely ruining his bandages, but he was too far gone to care. He fell onto his hands which rested on either sides of Ren’s head and panted. Endorphins rushed through his body in a tidal wave of calm and contentment. He could really use that nap now.  
They remained in silence as their breathing evened out and they regained their wits. Hux let his forehead drop and rest against Ren’s. They both closed their eyes. Hux told himself he could have ten seconds like this, and after that he would get up, get dressed, and walk out of the room to find a doctor.  
Hux counted back slowly.  
When he at last reached one, he lifted himself on shaky limbs and maneuvered himself out of the bed. He quickly retrieved his clothes and put them back on, even though they were filthy and smelled. Suddenly he remembered his desire to take a hot shower. He needed one now more than ever. He tried to think of harmless, practical things like this as he buttoned up his tunic.  
He was surprised when Ren spoke. “That was a mistake,” he said.  
Hux fussed with the sleeves of his shirt. “Yes,” he said. “Yes it was.”  
“It didn’t help anything,” Ren continued.  
“No,” Hux agreed. “It did not.”  
“Why then?” Ren asked.  
Hux turned around and smiled wryly at Ren. “Our hour of honesty is up.”  
Ren kept his gaze steady on Hux’s. “I know why,” he said.  
“We both know why,” Hux said quickly, cutting off whatever else Ren might have had to say. “We both know why and it doesn’t change anything. It’s as you said, our fates are not entertwined. Now clean yourself up before I call for the doctor.”  
Ren didn’t say anything more after this. They had both said all that they could. He simply pressed his lips together and stared at the wall. Here was the most powerful Force user in the galaxy resigned to his fate. Perhaps one last memory would not hurt.  
Hux walked back over to Ren and cupped the other man’s cheeks in his hands. “You know,” he said seriously. He waited for Ren to signify that he understood. When Ren gave a slight nod of his head, Hux kissed him carefully on the mouth. He kept it brief, not wanting to get drawn back in. And when he finally broke away, and Ren’s eyes fluttered open, he whispered it again: “You know.”  
“I know,” Ren whispered back.  
Without another word, Hux straightened up and headed for the door. He didn’t pause this time in opening it. With one fatal twist of a doorknob, he let fate have them.


End file.
